"I don't want phenomenal love confessions and expensive gifts and romantic moonlight walks and songs you wrote just for me and calls every five minutes to tell me you miss me.
i simply want you.
for the rest we'll see."
I was thinking on my way home from violin class, about how a successful relationship, or a good one, for me has been measured in terms of material things. I've used personal evaluation criteria to quantify and qualify. It surprises me that things don't have to be that way, that there are some things that just fall into place without you having to make an effort.
I've had - and I guess I still do have - expectations about how relationships and friendships should look like, should feel like, how they should be. But I realized today that it doesn't really matter if not all those expectations are met. It's enough having someone to share mundane things with. The rest will follow. I trust in that.
“You ever look a picture of yourself, and see a stranger in the background?. It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other peoples life have we been in. Were we a part of someone’s life when their dream came true or were we there when their dream died. Did we keep trying to get in? As if we were somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone elses life, and not even know it.”
There is nothing to fear. For nothing can diminish the true beauty at the heart of you.
How is it that you’re able to recognize beauty when you see it? Because that beauty resonates with the beauty that is you, and you know it, and you feel it.
Live from a perspective of beauty, for it is your most authentic nature. See each circumstance as an opportunity to express the unique beauty that is your life.
What could possibly be more beautiful than the ability to experience and comprehend beauty? That is who you are, and that is what you do.
Live the miracle that is the beauty that is you. Give your beauty to life, and it all grows more beautiful."
- Ralph Marston -
"I do my thing, and you do your thing. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, it's beautiful."
- Frederick S. Paris -
Look at the stars. Look how they shine for you, and all the things that you do.
Maybe it's from sleeping late. Or not drinking 8 glasses of water a day. Or being in front of a computer screen most of the day. Or thinking too much about work.
It's a slow tiredness. It seeps gently into the bones, spreading drowsiness - both mental and physical. I sort of want to drown in its lethargic character.
Seeing D makes me happy. He sort of lifts me from my bouts of tiredness. It's like escaping into a bubble where everything just drops into place. For a while, at least. For a sliver of time, everything's just peaceful and quiet and soothing. Just as it should be.
I thank God for little miracles as these moments. It's these moments that linger and rejuvenate once the tiredness has left my bones and mind.
Saturday started out a bit slow and sedated. I felt I was doing everything in slow motion :| Luckily, I made it through the day and wasn't too tired for dinner with high school friends at New Bombay in Glorietta 3.
Indian food takes some getting used to, and I'm thankful that my friends gave in to my request and dug into the food - not so much with gusto - but carefully and gave the dishes a try. I loved the spinach paneer and the tomato sauce paneer. I love paneer, in general :D It's always to gather everyone around and talk about how everyone's doing. Special thanks to Char for organizing the dinner :)
Walked around with Ai and Rae after dinner, and enjoyed fresh pretzels from Auntie Anne's :)
Today, D ran a 5k Marathon. Yehey! :D I'm sure I'd have simply plopped down on the ground after 15 minutes :| Haha. Spent the day at Serendra. Not many people around as there was a Pacquiao match - which he won! :D
Had lunch at Abe where we tried the rellenong mais and talked about scheming to get free cake by telling the waiters it was one of our birthdays :D Hmm, I think we did that before with Ni and Howell, and we got a pan of chocolate brownie cake for free. Fun times :)
Hobbes and Landes has a whole range of Monopoly games. I wonder if there are people who collect the different Monopoly editions. There's even an anti-Monopoly game where people assume monopolist and free market techniques. Seems pretty cool. There's a lot of interesting games out there nowadays - from scientific gadgets to word games to logical jigsaw blocks. H&L could very well be the "candy store" for present day kids :)
Of course, no trip to High Street would be complete without dropping by Fully Booked. Got a new book by an Irish writer - Claudia Carroll. Enjoyed peppermint mocha while we pored over a choose-your-own adventure book. I was successful at cracking the mystery at my first try while D got to try a whole lot of different endings before he settled on one he was satisfied with :D Choose-your-own-adventure books bring me back to the days I spent reading in the Dallington library. I loved those books when I was younger. They opened new worlds of mysteries and sleuthing :)
Ended the day with Monsignor salad, eggplant caviar (oddly combined with curry), and pumpkin soup at Healthy Kitchen.
Had a lot of fun and meaningful conversations today. It made me realize and acknowledge the fact that open conversation is truly important. Good and healthy relationships are built on honest sharing and good humor~
It's the end of the work week for most people. And while I still have work tomorrow, I still sort of feel the weekend adrenaline rush.
Attended a chamber of commerce youth meeting at gerry's tonight with nini. It was my first time to attend such a meeting. It was okay. Didn't do much, but at least I got to meet some new people :) I enjoy talking and meeting new people.
D picked nini and me up at Gerry's and we went to Dezaato Pan for dessert and tea. Had slices of fruit and pudding cake, choco banana cake, and the triple mousse cake. I liked the triple mousse cake for its rich chocolate consistency. Its sweetness was a good companion to the milky Nagasaki tea. The light spongy slices of the fruit and pudding cake balanced the richer chocolate tastes of the other two cake slices.
More than the food though, I love coffee shop conversations. I could sit for hours with good friends, sharing stories over cups of hot beverages and slices of yummy cake or thick sandwiches. It warms my heart to know that I have people I can laugh with and share things with. It really is the little moments that count.
Speaking of little things that make me happy, these two "quotes" made my week.
- "I take you as you are, for everything that you are. You don't have to pretend to be someone you're not." & "I'd cross planets for you."
I've had insecurity and abandonment issues for the longest time. So, it's just nice to hear someone say that they accept you unconditionally for who you are. Isn't it a relief to not have to walk around on tiptoe around people? :)
writing is the outlet for my introspective, rationalizing self.
i find comfort in it - whether it be laughing over the silliest of
things, sharing the mundaneness of daily routines, or breaking & dissecting the
complicated strands that bind life together.
welcome to my world. you may find it utterly eventless at times, my thoughts overly
philosophical, my views a bit distorted. but however you may find them to be, they are
the thoughts, opinions, events, and emotions that propel, inspire, trouble, and comprise
me.
my life encapsulated.
i am. i love.
bookworm
music lover
optimist
vegetarian
the hustle and bustle of airports
traveling and sightseeing
coffee table conversations
good food & yummy desserts
daydreaming
foreign languages
the sound of crunching leaves
live with intention walk to the edge listen hard practice wellness
play with abandon laugh choose with no regret continue to learn
appreciate your friends do what you love live as if this is all there is
diary of an anorexic girl
Dreams...how many dreams are out there, swirling in the atmosphere, mingling with oxygen,
stars, and earth? How many wisheson candles and falling stars have burned out with the
light of their source?
People walk around on a mission - a sad mission - to forget the dreams that were
nourished in youth. They feign happiness in the face of success, labor, and the monotomy of life.
There are too many abandoned dreams. Why doesn't someone reach up and grab one, fashion a net out of optimism, youth,
passion. Braid the threads of childhood, carelessness, and lazy Saturdays into a web of hope in which the dreams will
naturally fly.
Happiness is not an impossibility; it just needs a little
imagination.
one tree hill
Katherine Anne Porter once said: There seems to be a kind
of order in the universe in the movement of the stars and in
the turning of the earth and the changing of the seasons. But
human life is almost pure chaos. Everyone takes his stance,
asserts his own rights and feelings, mistaking the motives of
others, and his own.