smokin'

had dinner at Queens today. it's the Indian Asian restaurant along Jupiter, also the restaurant featured in philstar. read in the article that it served veggie so told my parents i wanted to give it a try. the food was pretty good. we told the waiter that we wanted our food only mildly spiced. turns out mild is still HOT. we drank quite a few glasses of water. but the spiciness added a unique zesty twist to the food. it was after all what gave the food an Indian twist. i ate roti and an Indian family was kind of staring at me as to how i was eating it. most of the restaurant goers were Indians and they seem kind if surprised seeing Chinese there ^o^ pretty funny. so final verdict: i'd go back again. the food was good. something different from the normal american fast food/chinese cuisine i eat. plus the fact that they have a lot of veg dishes doesn't hurt. Indian culture is actually really interesting. the place reminded me of prerna. hehe. =p

french class. we took photos for our roman photo. Mon was super funny with his antics and overacting. he kept the whole class laughing. it was really fun. acting and posing. at first, we thought he was absent. seeing how he emoted, we joked that he had was late for class because he had been rehearsing. ^o^ karyn and tita cora took the pics. karyn's camera is so cool!! an slr digicam. wow! she took classes in the states. seeing her capture shots made me want to take up photography ^-^ margaret, maek, karyn, and i made the skit in class last session. it was about a new student and how the class snubs him and he gets mad and takes revenge by locking the class out of the classroom and throwing away their cahiers d'exercises. then when the teacher gets mad because no one but the new student has homework, he plays hero by "finding" the lost cahiers d'exercises. overall, it was a fun class. last session's next week. have to enroll for module 10. hope the roman photo turns out well. then again, even if it doesn't, it was really memorable making it. <(^o^)/

*sigh* (btw, heard of the penis festival?)

i've just finished the related lit i sent to my email thru ebsco. i'm going to be doing a LOT of reading. around 25 pages of single spaced, tahoma font size 8. O-O whooboy. i can do this! ^o^ hopefully by tomorrow.

things to do:
psych testing paper
philo synthesis paper
history final project on bunraku puppets
social psych final paper
social psych long test (study!!)
chem exercises (i am way behind. mind not "spongy" so not very good absorbant)
finish application form for nanzan university

two weeks before finals. things are PILING up. makes me really want to procrastinate. gulp. to rationalize my overwhelming sense of panic for what is (yet) to come - all this will be over in 2 weeks. i can get pass this. nothing i've never done before. now, if i could only believe all that. haha.

learned in history class thurs. that there's such a thing as a penis festival. had the whole class laughing their heads off. apparently, it's a japanese folklore. there was a woman who had a demon in her uterus or something. and the demon would bite off men's members whenever the woman engaged in intercourse. so someone had to make a steel penis so that the demon' s teeth fell off. they even hold parades and carry around penis shaped stuff. unbelievable. also, discussed the urban legend of the slit-mouth woman. then how the japanese used to discriminate people with certain blood types (AB). overall, it was quite an interesting and entertaining report. \(^_^)>

cha came over today. it was fun, idlyllic, comfy ^o^ had "jackstone tournaments." talked. did homework. we kind of just loafed around all afternoon.

stuck in the future

You Are 25 Years Old

25 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

roadtrip

i just finished reading zigzag, the book angel lent me. it got me thinking about the "roadtrips" - more like out of town trips - i had, which consisted mostly of trips to tagaytay or clark. they were memorable albeit a bit boring. the closest thing to a roadtrip would probably be the time a few of my relatives - cousins, aunts, and all, plus my grandparents - and nini and i went to china. we went to namhai, shanghai, and xiamen. it was fun. we joked around, shopped (mostly window-shopped), and struggled to understand our so-called native language. that trip was the last time i had a trip with my grandpa. since then, we've never really had group outings anymore. it's fun to reminisce...

it'd be really cool to do things spontaneously, to make decisions on a whim, go where the wind takes you. most, actually all of my trips anywhere have been planned to the last detail. i'm not complaining. i am after all pretty orderly and panic at the occassional snags in the schedule. i just thought that routine can be boring. life needs to be spiced up a bit once in a while. wonder if i could handle all the spontaneity.

i really enjoyed the book. made me realize how as a psychology major, it's so easy to over read people's behavior. like in marsh's case, drawing violent pictures does not necessarily mean that the kid has a violent personality. sometimes we exaggerate the simplest things. i guess that could be lesson#1 in counseling - take things as they are. don't overread or jump to conclusions. counseling seems fulfilling. i think i could manage doing child counseling. at least, i'm getting ideas, things that could help me find a sense of direction.

the way home

yesterday was a memorable day for me. two things happened. first, i actually managed to get home from ateneo using only public transportation (clap! clap!) hehe v(^o^)v i took the lrt2 and lrt1 lines. it was actually fun. reminded me of when i was in taiwan. so, now i can get home when there's no one to pick me up. i got lost at recto coz i didn't know where the doroteo jose to monumento station once. luckily, the person i asked was kind enough to help me. so i made it home in one piece. whew. the second thing was that i was nominated for an exchange program to nanzan unviersity in nagoya, japan. i got the forms and brochure today. so now, i'm happy and scared at the same time. since i am unfamiliar with nagoya, i am wary of whether i should go or not. people have been telling me that i should go since it's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. some tell me that i should wait until after i graduate. actually, that's one of my parents' conditions. i can go to japan but i should finish my studies when i come back. ^-^which of course i will. so, i'm giving myself until next week to come up with a final decision. hope it's the right one i make.

and yes, the yearbook has finally come out. yey! feel like cheering and jumping up and down. thanks super to camie who supervised the entire process. so now, aizza and i are going to plan a dinner reunion so that the yearbooks can be given to their rightful owners. after that, my high school responsibility is over. hehe.

and i'm thinking, i might give the med city psychiatric ward a chance. talked to my cousin tonight. got a better picture of how it's like working in such a ward, asked a few questions. seems interesting.

gateway

we went to gateway today after i attended the pnco (phil. national chemistry olympiad). to think that high school students can answer chemistry questions that i studied and encountered only in college - wow! ^o^ so we went to shopwise and did a bit of shopping - mostly juices and chips. gateway's a nice place. i love the oasis! such a beautiful garden. walked around a bit. bought a pair of shoes at celine. lost out on another pair at trod (diesel shoes) coz they didn't have my size. window shopped at lacoste. shoes were nice, i would've loved to get a pair or two but the prices were way beyond my budget. who needs a 4ooo-peso pair of shoes?! got the kelly clarkson and ryan cabrera cds at a record bar. peeked at the lrt2 station. reminded me of taipei. very modern and clean. would love to give it a try sometime. grabbed a bean burrito at taco bell. marveled at how people were like ants - drawn towards anything sweet - like people drawn to new establishments like gateway and market market. took a look at the cinemas. lotsa people. nice though. carpeted with this big intricately-carved dome for the ceiling - cozy and elegant. worried about my philo paper. still haven't read the labor code. pretty much just breezed through the day. a day to rest and spend time with the family. nothing eventful happened but it was memorable all the same \(~0~)/

was able to download the save the last dance for me ost. cd for easy listening. breezy, light, and fun. i'm watching the show on tv. i'm enjoying it so far.

currently listening to: lindsay lohan, hilary duff, switchfoot, green day, fly to the sky, jinusean (love their recent single! - telephone number) =p

probe on pork politics

yey!! our polsci forum is finally done and over with. it was a success!! i was so nervous. good thing everything turned out well. the guest speakers, cong. albano and cong. bacani, arrived on time. the stage set-up did resemble a talk show set and the group members delivered! (thanks kat, prerna, and migs!! ^o^ and angel for taking charge of the powerpoint!) it just came naturally - the flow of the questions, the humor and the responses of the guests, the participation of the audience - it was sorta unbelievable. after all the planning and calling and worrying, the thing was finally done. i just feel really relieved and happy, a bit sad. hehe. bittersweet - the feeling you get when all the hard work has finally paid off...my polsci group was a really fun group to work with.

i learned a lot fromt the interviews with the congressmen. actually, got me interested in politics for a while. brings back the joy of learning. sometimes, i get so bombarded with work that school seems too much like a chore. nice to have moments wherein learning can be enjoyed.

so my hell week is over. the tests, papers, and group reports ended with my three group reports this week. social psych. i enjoyed doing the handout - looking for comic strips and layouting plus nina did a really good job with the kit! ^-^ my fellow groupmates were cool. then came history which was short and manageable enough. the reporting was delayed for two weeks i think so it was a relief to finally get it done. so there. the only major thing i have for next week is the philo research paper which i will start on tomorrow...hopefully...

had my interview today for the japan foreign exchange program. didn't do too well. they asked about politics (how the phil. government is corrupt) and what i would say if i were to represent the filipino youth. most of the time, i just felt overwhelmed. mind was a complete blank. i was able to say something so i guess it wasn't that bad. just felt intimidated. oh well. we'll see how things go. either way, it'll be okay. ^o^

mmm: l'espoir

a very long engagement

mathilde aime manech. manech aime mathilde.

i found the film to be good, albeit a bit somber and heart-tugging. scenes of war never fail to disgust me, to scare me. i will never be able to fathom how people can have so much hatred, how they can go on such widespread killing rampages. is man innately bad? i have often believed that God created man as good and loving. after futher thought and reflection, i am beginning to doubt this. it appears that man becomes bad when the situation is conducive to violence and hatred. in the end, we are merely victims of our emotions, of the situations we find ourselves in. will we ever escape from all that? will we ever truly think for ourselves, for the good of humankind?

at the heart of the film lies the themes of hope and love. is it wrong to be too hopeful? are our lives destined or do we create our destiny? a flea would be able to carry a basket if he gathered strength from all the "ifs" we ask. mathilde constantly hopes...if the i get to the bend before the car does, if before the count of 7 the conductor arrives, then manech is still alive...if...if...if...she asks the questions out of fear and desperation. she asks them out of hope. and it is hope that makes her live from day to day. it is hope that makes her life meaningful.

by hoping too much, do we fail to see reality? the little signs we ask for manifest themselves in our "if" questions. we seem to be challenging our fate. from the film, i realized that hope is such a strong emotion. faced with uncertainties, we can do nothing but hope and pray. hope is our solution to helplessness. it sustains us. when we hope too much, we create false realities. what we hope for is what becomes real. mathilde has been hoping so much that manech is alive that she has a hard time facing reality.

but then again, we all need to escape reality once in a while. in a world where nothing is for certain, we unconsciously live life hopefully. we need to feel certain about certain things. we hope that our families will be safe. we hope that the world will not break out in war. we hope that we pass the exam. we hope that we will rise from the ashes, from our hardships. hope seems to sustain every human action. because it is only through hope that we are able to make life seem sort of stable. we hope that there is a cure for the "bad" in humankind.

in effect, i am like mathilde. i am hoping for love to come back. hoping that love will be strong enough to conquer evil. so much has been happening. things that scare me, that make me want to hide myself and my family in a protective bubble. i want the world to be safer, more peaceful...and all i can do is pray...and hope...