lilac inspirations

1. Wine & Roses Bag, 2. Purple Flats, 3. Color coded bookshelf, 4. Teddy Bear, 5. Smocked Two-tone Skirt, 6. home office, 7. Reading Corner, 8. 23/52: I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.9. Berry Tiramisu

overwhelming

For some odd reason, work felt overwhelming today. 

No violin lesson today but went to SM anyway to buy air purifier for Ama. Dinner with Ni at Chaikofi. Bought books at National. Looking forward to reading Kinsella's Twenties Girl! :)

Will leave you with two quotes:

From Twenties Girl,

"Sometimes I think we'd do better as dandelion seeds - no family, no history, just floating off into the world, each on our piece of fluff." Well, that is until isolation sets in and we go back to clinging to our families like they were our life buoys in deep ocean waters.

From The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society (which I finished today and absolutely loved. Thank you Angel!),

Juliet: "We could go on longing for one another and pretending not to notice forever. This obsession with dignity can ruin your life if you let it." Quite true, don't you think?

badminton

Played badminton this week as well - this time with Ste, Wincen, Howell, and Ni. My dad joined us later on during the game. It was pretty fun. Ste can return difficult shots and Wincen whacks the shuttlecock as if his life depended on it :P Howell seems to be the expert though. Even the way he carries his racket looks so professional :)

After playing, we headed off to Hap Chan for a late dinner. Co-co joined us there :) Fun conversation about movies, university, music, etc. I found out today that Nickelback is a Canadian band :) Cool~

Today was a pretty laidback day. Had breakfast at Pancake House with Mommy, then went to YingYing to buy pack lunches. That place always seems to be bustling. 

Pretty tired now~ I think i'll curl up in bed and read the Guernsey book until I fall asleep. *yawn*

Wincen had an interesting take on my lab rat dream - I dreamt I volunteered to be turned into a lab rat (don't ask me why XP) He said maybe I shouldn't allow myself to be a guinea pig for others because if I do I might not be able to find a way out. Hmm...food for though~

rainy days

It's been raining the past few days. The pitter patter on the window panes makes me want to snuggle in bed and not get up till late in the day. But alas, work beckons >.< 

I had a sort of Eureka moment tonight while I was browsing at the Yahoo Korea website. I remembered when I was watching All About Eve on Chinese cable TV. I was in high school then, I think, and I'd stay up way past my bedtime just to catch the episodes. It was then when my love for Korean sprung up, and I've tried to study the language by myself a few times. Now that I'm taking "formal" classes, I've gained a more tidy sense of structure. It's amazing how I can know understand the squarish script that so intrigued me ever since. I must say though that I still appreciate the Japanese language more, although that's probably coz I can understand more of it than I can Korean :P

Is it just me or do the days pass by so much faster now? I feel as if I count my days by the after work activities I have. Wednesday was badminton day with Ni. Cats, Jack, Mane, and Win joined as well :) Thursday was violin class day. Today, Mane came over and we did Korean homework together. Tomorrow is my last day at GMAT review class...which means I have to gear up for the actual exam :(

I've been drifting in and out of productive/unproductive moods. Time seems to pass by fast at the office, although I'm not quite sure where the time is spent. 

I've had weird dreams this week. There was one where I dreamt I turned into a rat for a lab experiment. That I did the experiment willingly is what shocks me :O What state of mind was I in to agree to such a thing? Coincidentally, the next day I saw a small rat (more like a mouse) in one of the office garbage cans. The next day, I dreamt I was in a sort of CSI show. There were all sorts of subplots that I got confused myself as to what the dream was really about. 

Watching Harry Potter tomorrow :) 

Talked to my dad last night. He shared his thoughts about work. I can't seem to summon enough passion or excitement for my work. This is not to say that I'm unhappy. I just feel as if I want to do more, be more. 

Watched Hannah Montana last week with Zel and my mom. Cute movie :) Would be cool to visit Tennessee. The setting made me think of the movie, Lassie and Anne of Green Gables. There's something calming about wide open fields/farms and horseback riding. It just feels so free...

the perfect jam

I have been craving for jam these past two weekends. I scoured Puregold for some good ol' jam but I couldn't find one to my liking. Then, the past weekend, I went to Rockwell and was able to find a jam that looked good enough. Could've been better, but it was good enough. I've been thinking of thick brown toast slathered with warm butter, then topped with a rich fruit jam - my preference being strawberry or blueberry. I settled for a French blueberry jam. I still miss the blueberry jam I used to buy in Japan. It was a cheap brand - similar to the SM bonus brand - but it was rich and yummy. 

I wish things in life could be fixed as easily as finding a perfect jam. I would even settle for a good enough fix. I've just been feeling restless and so I pour my restless energy in violin practice. Recently, I've been playing the piano again, after being inspired by Nodame from Nodame Cantabile :) Sweet drama :) 

The weekend past, I watched a movie, bought books, studied Korean and math. Things seem to be getting routine again. But the learning keeps my weeks bearable. I'm slowly getting the hang of Korean. Very similar to Japanese and it's easier to read. Grammar's kind of tricky, but after French, grammar for Asian languages seem so much easier :P 

My mom talked about buying burial clothes for my grandparents. It's a "double month" in the Chinese calendar, and the Chinese say that such things can only be bought on such months. And tradition also says that it's the daughters who are responsible for paying for these garments. My grandmother appreciated the gesture, I think, but she laughed it off saying she preferred more modern garments so my mom need not bother. I just suddenly realized how steeped in tradition the Chinese culture is, and how little I know about Buddhist practices and beliefs, about the traditional Chinese ways. I do not know if doing these so-called practices really do any good, but I guess there's no harm in doing them. 

I also realized that I have come to a point in life where death has become a natural subject for conversation. For my grandfather, the mention of death scares him. For my grandmother, it is treated as a matter-of-fact thing. These thoughts and conversations on passing away do no good for my already restless spirit.

I'm blabbing but I don't really care. I'm just writing things as they pop into my head. I finished reading The Art of Racing in the Rain. Beautiful book. It touched me and made me believe in human resilience and happy endings. Now, I'm reading the book Angel lent me - The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. I'm thinking about which drama to watch next after finishing Nodame Cantabile. Maybe I'll switch to a Chinese one before watching another Japanese drama. 

Will end blabbering here. 

...

I think I'll eat a slice of buttered toast with jam tomorrow. 

the story behind the photograph

i chanced upon this lovely site - beautiful and charming photos by stephanie williams. 

i love how each photograph seems to be telling a story of its own :)

Of interesting books and good friends

Met up with Angel today at CCF :D I missed that girl! Also got to see Carolyn :)

I love how we both love to read and that we can discuss books, old friends, recent happenings, and everything under the sun...kinda like we used to before at Caf Up. 

She lent me The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. Might seem like a boring title but I've read many great reviews about it. :)

Angel got to watch Wicked in NY! Coolness! I hope I get an opportunity to do so too.

Today's service made me reflect on my own impatience about the future, about my plans, about where I am now. It seems as if I grumble more than ever these days, even if just to myself. Today was a reminder that I need to trust God, trust that He has plans for me, and these things might not happen according to my timetable. 

Got an email from the Rotman correspondent today. Will email back tomorrow with a reply. 

Dinner at Ama's house later. Howell might go~ Should be interesting.

Dinner last night at Uno was nice as well. Got to wear my new heels :) Also saw Jilliane, who has such a happy disposition :)

frustration

i need to snap out of this spell i'm in.

i've been on a constant string of low spells lately.

i'm tired of thinking myself happy. 

if only choices were effortless...

let me wallow for a bit. i'll get tired of it soon.